seriously worried.

so i am waiting on my tax returns. they should be here within the next three days. however.. since moving, dropping out of school, moving again, having a baby, and working/trying to make ends meet.. i have been somewhat delinquent on paying my student loans back. i was trying to get all my bills in order today so i can budget this tax return well and pay EVERYTHING off with the (semi) large amount i am supposed to be getting back. i was feeling really, REALLY good about getting out of debt until i opened a letter i received from the bank.. stating that if i didn’t make a payment on my loan by 1/26/2012.. they hold the right to stop me from getting my tax refund. needless to say i never made that payment. all i can think is “NOOOOO!” i mean, how can i give them their money if they don’t give me mine? DANG IT. so i am literally praying they have mercy on me.. because this money was about to get me out of all the debt i have accrued over the years and get my family back on the right track.

this is me coming clean.. no one should have ever given me a credit card, or three, when i was only seventeen. i have learned my lessons, i only have one credit card now and it is in a safe place and used only when absolutely necessary. so, student loan people, i swear to you if i can just get this money, i will pay off all my old credit cards once and for all AND start paying you the monthly installments on time! i have been waiting for this return for months, knowing it would be just what i need to get myself together. just, PLEASE.

these next three days will be high anxiety mommy days.